I’m too tired to cry
Too exhausted to feel
I’m Sitting for a moment after driving family to see my father.
He was very happy for a few hours.
I have poured myself into my favorite chair after making another cup of coffee. Sadly the caffeine is no longer helping. This is cup six or seven but I can’t seem to catch my breathe.
I have laundry to do, bills to pay for both myself and my father. Meals to make for the coming week yet I can’t seem to convince myself to move.
I have a headache, a heartache and a general feeling of unrest. How very easy it would be to lay myself beneath a fifth of Scotch.
I inhale thinking of the last near months worth of drama realizing I can no longer remember the separation of days. Oddly I feel and recollect everything as if it has been one long day.
Sleep is no longer restful, time no longer seems my own as I shift from one responsibility to another. Just as I almost have my father situated another family member is in need of assistance.
I will not complain for many before me have known much worse. The indentured and enslaved would chuckle over my mere inconvenience. As would I if only I could source enough energy to break a smile.
I feel completely and utterly drained for the second day in a row. I have begun to misplace and forget things.
I manage to get a Fig Newton down with the cup of Joe.
The work will not get itself done and I have no reinforcements so I will have to find a way.
I hear a dial tone in the distance yet all the phones are seated properly.
I’m near the bottom of the cup, coffee and resolve.
Daylights burning, I slam the remaining tepid coffee and stand to face the day.
Maybe the next cup will do the trick.
